Monday, February 19, 2007

10 THOUGHTS FOR 2007
  • #10: Life is sexually transmitted.
  • #9: Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die.
  • #8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
  • #7: Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
  • #6: Some people are like a slinky - not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
  • #5: Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing.
  • #4: All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
  • #3: Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
  • #2: In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
  • AND THE NUMBER ONE THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.

2 comments:

MikeT said...

Yeah, some people are just like slinkies. Unfortunately, like slinkies, they have a tendency to survive that fall down the stairs...

And #1 is scary in how accurate it is!

Wonder Woman said...

Survive perhaps, but not without a few kinks ;)